a question which seems to answer itself, however, still stumps some people is one that i refer to when i get the question "are they twins?". a dear friend recently had a post picked up by the fresno bee in which she rants about people feeling at liberty to discuss/criticize/question her son's red hair. in it jen says her "personal favorite comment is: 'Oh, look! He has red hair!'" I found it quite ironic that she posted this about her sweet Eli, when I had this post drafted too discuss a similar topic that i frequently bemoan.
twins. fascinating. i always had a feeling i would have twins. i remember YEARS ago before we even thought of having children, listening to a program on NPR about twins. being the science nerd that i am, i was completely captivated by everything the speaker had to say. fascinating were the results of her research, the details about epigenitic differences in identical twins while their DNA is virtually indistinguishable and the fact that identical twins are a medical anomaly.
in my vision of the future, i would have twins first, but i guess i had that (and may other visions) backwards!
so, now in present day, i find myself nothing short of flabbergasted, when i have complete strangers approach me asking "are they twins?". wait, let's see here...we have two children, who are OBVIOUSLY the same age, OBVIOUSLY the same size, and OBVIOUSLY the same gender, being toted in identical infant carriers, and their brain tells them that the aforementioned question is a logical one. hummmm. what happened to natural selection? we've got some work to do in that department.
as jen mentions in her post, when these strangers ask such a dimwitted question, it requires me to carry on a conversation with them as though the question is completely valid. additionally i'm expected to do so without the slightest hint of sarcasm, which is quite an effortless task. ;-)
what i want to say is, "no, ma'am, they're not twins. One is my son and one is a friend's son and i just so happen to have a double stroller and we just so happen to have identical infant carriers and we just so happen to have the same dna and our sons just so happen to look like the other's mirror image and out of the goodness of my heart i volunteered to take them to the doctor for their check up at the same time...."
what i end up saying is "yes, ma'am, they are twins."
to which she/he inevitably replies "wow, you have your hands full!"
gritting my teeth to chalk, i say "yes, i do!"
maybe i can be free of this socially inept individual now...
when they reply with an almost rhetorical tone "are these your only children?"
"no, ma'am, i have two more"
"two more TWINS?!?!"
"no, i have a 2.5 yr old and a 5 yr old."
here it comes.... "how do you DO it?!"
"well, oh wise one, i struggle daily debating whether i will lay on my bed in a puddle of my own piss and drool, or raise the four children i have!"
"are they all boys?"
"no, i have three sons and a daughter"
"oh, thank god you got a little princess...."
don't even get me started....
2 comments:
I red Jen's post last week and was just dying...thinking of the same as you...granted identicals are even more of DOH!!! But I feel the same no lady, they just happen to be the same size, same clothes, call each other sister.. sometimes I want to answer, No, I was a whore and got PG again immediately after!!
I can sooooo relate...those people are almost as annoying as the ones that say, "wow, you are huge" or "wow, when are you due" when you are 8 months pregnant. I actually had one lady tell me "wow, you must be having twins" when I was pregnant with our twins. I wanted to punch her.
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